Provoked Again
I woke up late! Huhuhuhuhu... Last night I had a bad bad bad dream. But I forgot what the dream was all about. Nyay! Hmm.. My teacher in research always records the attendance. By the time I get 7 absences, I'm dead meat. My current status: 3/7. Huhuhuhu....
This morning was not so good. Last night
I slept at 3:00am. I really felt bad and this hatred that grew inside me keeps me out from thinking right.
I remember back then when I was still in highschool, I was so unruly. I go to school late, I cut class, colored all my hair red, jumped across the fence , and make fun of some teachers. Those days were fun.
The hatred I keep inside is something that I want to show to everyone. I wanted to shout everytime I talk, swear people who made me feel bad, frown in front of people, and make special people around me cry. I'm a bad bad bad kid. My whole being was consumed. But I managed to get my crooked life straight again.
Now, here I am again. After 3 years of hate-free living, I am again provoked. I hate so many things that happened in my life lately. People I love are the people I hate. There are 4 of them - but really they are so special. How do I keep myslef from doing so... I don't want to hate. Help me God, if you really care about me you won't let this happen. I'm willing to forgive and forget everything but I need someone to help me. You are watching me, I know. And I know you are not pleased to see my soul rot.
Xiao |9:02 AM
Thursday, December 01, 2005
